Ten ways how she pisses me off

By
MonkeyWong
Posted in: Personal

I’m here to list ten ways how ………… pisses me off.
So, I fill in the blank with Donkey!
Time to wash dirty linen in public …..

1st : Lizard
Donkey: Oooii….
Monkey: What?
Donkey: Come quickly!
Monkey: What?
Donkey: Lizard, catch it!
Monkey: Done.
Donkey: Another one there.
Monkey: Ok, done!
Donkey: Still got one there.
Monkey: Dammit, I got only two hands.

You know what, I become crocodile lizard hunter since I stay together with her! The worst, when I went outstation last week, she even called me and wanted me to come back to catch lizard in our guest room. Maybe that’s why when lizards see monkey, they ‘run’ damn fast. And now I can even catch lizards without hurting them, ‘kung fu’ upgraded already!

2nd : Football
Donkey: Can you stop watching football!
Monkey: Once a week only!
Donkey: What so special about that ball!
Monkey: You don’t understand one lah!
Donkey: My ‘balls’ not better than that ball meh!
Monkey: Puttt………. (vomit blood!)

I just don’t understand how can Donkey compares her ‘balls’ with that ball? Just like she never understand why I like football so much.

3rd : Clorets Mint Tablets
Donkey: Wei, don’t eat that stuff can or not?
Monkey: Why? I like it so much!
Donkey: I hate that smell!
Monkey: Mint very fresh leh!
Donkey: Fresh meh? Like eating Colgate toothpaste!

What, eating Colgate?! Damn, that’s the reason why I never eat or drink anything with mint flavor in front of her anymore.

4th : The floor
Monkey: Honey, I’m home!
Bannnnnnng…….
Donkey: What happen? Why you lay on the floor?
Monkey: Aiyooo…. How can my anti-slip floor also become like this ar?
Donkey: Hehehe…

Donkey likes to mop the floor everyday, either is clean or not. I know that’s good, my house is always clean, very clean! But, can you imagine my floor tile shine like mirror, and monkey falls down very frequently! :P

5th : Dress
Donkey: This shirt is good, suitable for you!
Monkey: Walau a, uncle next door wear one!
Donkey: This shoe is cool!
Monkey: My father sure likes it!
Donkey: ………

I still feel young, I don’t wanna dress up like Ah Pek that soon, hehehe…. :P

7th: Part time job
Donkey: Can’t you stop bring your work home?
Monkey: This one part time job!
Donkey: I don’t care!
Monkey: But, I have to preset this tomorrow!
Donkey: Shut up!
Monkey: Then, do what?
Donkey: Watch movie together with!
Monkey: ………. (Speechless)

Maybe I should spend more time with her!

6th: Argument
Donkey : See that cute black doggy!
Monkey: Black meh? Is white lah dear!
Donkey: I said is black!
Monkey: No lah, is white!
Donkey: Black, is black, black, black….
Monkey: Ok, ok, is black! Sorry loh! (Colour blind meh!)
Donkey: I forgive you!
Monkey: ….. (What, talk like Peter Parker (aka Spiderman 3))

Never argue with Donkey, I never win, never ever!

8th: Too fat
Donkey: Hmmm, I think u’re too fat!
Monkey: Not lah!
Donkey: 80kg oledy, too fat!
Monkey: I’m tall mah, heavy only not too fat!
Donkey: Too fat!
Monkey: Ok, I’m fat, very fat! (Remember item no. 6 above!)

9th: ?
Donkey ….
She……
Errrr…..
I surrender, I can’t find anything to write anymore! :P

I know Donkey for more than 10 years, ever since we stay together 2 years ago, she really pisses me off sometime! But, on the other hand, she really brings me a lot of joy, everytime I look into her eyes, I feel great, eveytime she smile at me like a kid, I feel happy. No one perfect including Donkey and even myself! After all the things we been through this few years, especially the unfortunate incident last year, that’s doesn’t matter anymore, at least we still hold hand in hand together and our hearts still close to each other. Thanks Donkey, thank you for being my lovely Mrs Monkey!

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